23 episodes · first aired 2012-09-27
| Still | # | Title | Overview | Air date | Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
 | 01 | I Changed My Mind About the Milk 2012-09-27 | Walden plans a big surprise for Zoey's birthday. | 2012-09-27 | 4.9 |
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Ratings shown are community scores. Once OMDB is wired, these become per-episode IMDB values.
| 02 |
A Big Bag of Dog 2012-10-04 |
Zoey and Walden break up, causing Walden to experience a breakdown. |
| 2012-10-04 |
| 5.7 |
 | 03 | Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt 2012-10-11 | Alan and Lyndsey decide to spice things up in the bedroom. | 2012-10-11 | 5.4 |
 | 04 | You Do Know What the Lollipop's For 2012-10-18 | Walden starts to feel his age when a friend's daughter comes to town. | 2012-10-18 | 6.1 |
 | 05 | That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam 2012-10-25 | Despite Alan's warnings, Walden starts dating Rose. | 2012-10-25 | 5.9 |
 | 06 | Ferrets, Attack! 2012-11-01 | Walden must choose between Zoey and Rose. | 2012-11-01 | 5.6 |
 | 07 | Avoid the Chinese Mustard 2012-11-08 | When Walden gets tired of the complications that come with a traditional relationship, he hires an actress to be his girlfriend; Jake plans a rendezvous with Missi (Miley Cyrus) at the beach house. | 2012-11-08 | 5.3 |
 | 08 | Something My Gynecologist Said 2012-11-15 | Alan feels reluctant to make a commitment to Lyndsey, but an unexpected source inspires him; Walden enjoys being the boy-toy of a wealthy older woman. | 2012-11-15 | 5.8 |
 | 09 | I Scream When I Pee 2012-11-29 | Alans famous ex-wife, Kandi, wants to reconcile; when Berta isn't interested in celebrating her birthday, Walden tries to make her day special. | 2012-11-29 | 5.6 |
 | 10 | One Nut Johnson 2012-12-06 | Alan helps Walden create a new identity so he can avoid women who are only interested in his money. | 2012-12-06 | 6.1 |
 | 11 | Give Santa a Tail-Hole 2012-12-13 | Walden juggles his two identities; Alan ends up alone on Christmas. | 2012-12-13 | 6.0 |
 | 12 | Welcome to Alancrest 2013-01-03 | Alan invests Walden's money in Kate's fashion line; leading a double life takes its toll on Walden. | 2013-01-03 | 5.9 |
 | 13 | Grab a Feather and Get in Line 2013-01-10 | Alan and Walden go to Kate's fashion show in New York so Walden can reveal the truth about his identity. | 2013-01-10 | 4.3 |
 | 14 | Run, Steven Staven! Run! 2013-01-31 | Alan is faced with relationship trouble when he does not give Lyndsey a key to the beach house; Walden, Alan, Herb and Billy commiserate about relationships. | 2013-01-31 | 6.0 |
 | 15 | Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It 2013-02-07 | When Jake brings his 36-year-old girlfriend home for a visit, Alan is concerned; Walden tries to hide something from Alan. | 2013-02-07 | 5.9 |
 | 16 | Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby 2013-02-14 | Depressed on Valentine's Day, Walden tries to talk Kate into giving him another chance; Alan's holiday plans go south. | 2013-02-14 | 5.8 |
 | 17 | Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries 2013-02-21 | When Walden runs into his ex and they start talking about getting back together, Alan worries that she is not good enough. | 2013-02-21 | 6.1 |
 | 18 | The 9:04 from Pemberton 2013-03-07 | After a fight with Walden, Alan decides to move in with Herb. | 2013-03-07 | 5.7 |
 | 19 | Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon 2013-03-14 | Alan and Walden end up partying too hard as they try to cheer up Herb. | 2013-03-14 | 5.4 |
 | 20 | Bazinga! That's from a TV Show 2013-04-04 | Walden and Alan are caught in the crossfire when Jake cheats on his girlfriend (Jaime Pressly) with her 18-year-old daughter. | 2013-04-04 | 5.2 |
 | 21 | Another Night with Neil Diamond 2013-04-25 | Alan has a difficult time coping when Lyndsey breaks up with him. | 2013-04-25 | 4.9 |
 | 22 | My Bodacious Vidalia 2013-05-02 | With encouragement from Walden, Alan decides to update his look; Alan is faced with a moral dilemma when he attracts a married woman. | 2013-05-02 | 5.8 |
 | 23 | Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped 2013-05-09 | Walden dates an attractive 22-year-old (Hilary Duff), but ends up being more interested in her grandmother (Marilu Henner); Jake and Alan go on a trip. | 2013-05-09 | 5.6 |
