22 episodes · first aired 2009-09-21
| Still | # | Title | Overview | Air date | Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
 | 01 | 818-JKLPUZO 2009-09-21 | Charlie must make a difficult decision about his future and with which woman he wants to spend his life: Chelsea or Mia. | 2009-09-21 | 7.5 |
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Ratings shown are community scores. Once OMDB is wired, these become per-episode IMDB values.
| 02 |
Whipped Unto the Third Generation 2009-09-28 |
When Chelsea convinces Charlie to let Alan's new girlfriend, Melissa, move in, the girls end up taking over Charlie's house. |
| 2009-09-28 |
| 7.4 |
 | 03 | Mmm, Fish. Yum. 2009-10-05 | Alan ends up playing maid to Judith's new baby as well as his former mother-in-law. Meanwhile, Jake uses an incriminating photo to blackmail Charlie. | 2009-10-05 | 7.3 |
 | 04 | Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator 2009-10-12 | Alan starts working for Evelyn as Charlie works to fix the relationship between Chelsea and Jake. | 2009-10-12 | 7.3 |
 | 05 | For the Sake of the Child 2009-10-19 | Jake stops at nothing to get away from Charlie and Alan, after they embarrass him out in public. | 2009-10-19 | 7.2 |
 | 06 | Give Me Your Thumb 2009-11-02 | Alan's advice to Chelsea that she get breast-reduction surgery is not met with enthusiasm by Charlie, who kicks him out, but staying with Evelyn has its own challenges. | 2009-11-02 | 7.6 |
 | 07 | Untainted by Filth 2009-11-09 | Alan and Charlie are shocked when they wake up next to a strange woman, and try to find out what happened. | 2009-11-09 | 7.5 |
 | 08 | Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle. 2009-11-16 | While overcoming a bad break-up, Chelsea invites her beautiful college roommate to stay at the house. | 2009-11-16 | 6.7 |
 | 09 | Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair 2009-11-23 | While Alan struggles to cure his baldness, Charlie deals with the problem that he can't satisfy Chelsea. | 2009-11-23 | 7.5 |
 | 10 | That's Why They Call It "Ball Room" 2009-12-07 | Chelsea wants Charlie to take dancing lessons for the wedding, when Charlie uncovers the truth that Chelsea has been lying about her finances. | 2009-12-07 | 6.5 |
 | 11 | Warning, It's Dirty 2009-12-14 | Jake is taught the art of infidelity by Charlie, while Celeste is away for Christmas. | 2009-12-14 | 7.5 |
 | 12 | Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste 2010-01-11 | Jake hopes to win back Celeste by writing her love songs. Alan and Herb hope to keep Judith from finding out they've become friends. | 2010-01-11 | 7.4 |
 | 13 | Yay, No Polyps! 2010-01-18 | Charlie opts to have a colonoscopy in order to avoid going on a trip with Chelsea to see her parents. However, when he returns home, he finds her parents at his house. | 2010-01-18 | 6.4 |
 | 14 | Crude and Uncalled For 2010-02-01 | Charlie suspects Chelsea likes the lawyer representing Alan after his arrest for a bar fight. | 2010-02-01 | 7.2 |
 | 15 | Aye, Aye, Captain Douche 2010-02-08 | Chelsea and Charlie's relationship is at risk when Charlie's jealousy comes between them. | 2010-02-08 | 6.1 |
 | 16 | Tinkle Like a Princess 2010-03-01 | Charlie runs off to Vegas and returns with a new wife, but she's not Chelsea. | 2010-03-01 | 6.1 |
 | 17 | I Found Your Moustache 2010-03-08 | Charlie and Chelsea have a post-breakup one-night stand. | 2010-03-08 | 5.9 |
 | 18 | Ixnay on the Oggie Day 2010-03-22 | Charlie has a return engagement with Chelsea's best friend, while Alan has an unexpected effect on a new female patient. | 2010-03-22 | 6.6 |
 | 19 | Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave 2010-04-12 | Alan is torn between the bad influence of Jake's new friend and the hotness of his mother. | 2010-04-12 | 6.5 |
 | 20 | I Called Him Magoo 2010-05-10 | Alan tries for an intimate night at a hotel with his new girlfriend, while Charlie takes a different approach to obtain the "girlfriend experience" | 2010-05-10 | 6.3 |
 | 21 | Gumby with a Pokey 2010-05-17 | Charlie is visited by the ghosts of his ex-girlfriends while Alan and Jake are on a road trip. | 2010-05-17 | 7.6 |
 | 22 | This Is Not Gonna End Well 2010-05-24 | Charlie is miffed over Alan's planned attendance of Chelsea's birthday party and suffers the indignity of having Jake chauffer him around following a license suspension. | 2010-05-24 | 6.2 |
